About Me

Just a guy fighting evil wherever I find it. I'm glad you are here to read about my adventures escaping and ultimately defeating the evil Nonhof. First time readers should start at the beginning to get a true sense of the history behind our epic battle of good vs evil. I also caution you to be careful of how you submit comments. As the saying goes; an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. Who knows if Nonhof is aware of this blog or not - I fear the worst.

Nonhof, perhaps you should think of that sword and its location:)

Monday, June 1, 2009

Day 6

Hello my friends. I spent the weekend trying to understand the motivation of Nonhof. Why is he trying to destroy the youth of America? It is so easy to say "insanity" and just write him off as a member of another terrorist organization. I felt that there must be, somewhere in his history, a clue. I have searched high and low and this afternoon I found something interesting.

We all know the history of Nonhof as written in the history books. He attended Dordt College - which is usually followed by laughter. It turns out that this is no laughing matter. Dordt is the name of the college but it is not associated with the Christian Reformed Church as thought. Instead it is associated with a terrorist organization. The name of this organization is Do Organized Real Destructive Terrorism. From this name comes the acroynm DORDT. The founders of this organization then found a way to tie their name into a religious reference. Does this actually suprise anybody?

The manifesto of DORDT states:
We the loyal and faithful disciples of Shakespere will do all in our power to corrupt minds with filth, garbage and other useless crap. (note that the manifesto is actually 17 horrifying pages of statements and goals - most of which made me physically ill and are unprintable)

Did not anyone wonder why this 'religious' college was stuck in the middle of an Iowa hog farm? They did there best to stay away from prying eyes, and for the last 54 years they successfully hid - but no longer.

On another note, Fidel just sent me another box of cigars. I plan to relax for 2 more weeks and then leave on the 16th of June. I am confident that I will be able to elude Nonhof as I make my way to the border.

Keep the faith.

1 comment:

  1. That Manifesto resembles the one sent to me last summer by my most zealous critic.